Friday, December 30, 2011

Psylocke says Happy New Year! —
Or something to that effect!


This is my first Psylocke, and the almost-final drawing of 2011! Heh! Fun!

***

Thursday, December 29, 2011

HUGO —
I was going to write a review of the movie "Hugo," but then Kevin Drum did it for me. Pretty much word-for-word what I was going to say.
http://motherjones.com/kevin-drum/2011/12/half-hugo-good-movie-which-half

***

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Xmas Day Drawing Marathon! —
OKAY! The Xmas day drawing marathon is OVER! I drew from noon to 9:15pm, with a one-hour break. That’s 8 hours! I completed 2 existing large commissions, and I did 2 LIVE commissions! And I had 12 to 17 viewers ALL DAY! It was great fun! Thanks everybody!


***

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Sketch Blog —
I've begun posting sketches every day on my Tumblr blog. You should FOLLOW IT!

***

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Sexy Xmas Art! —
I drew a couple of hot Santa Girls tonight! Here's one now!


The blonde was hot, too!

***

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Surprise Tentacle Butt Sex —
Here's a nifty drawing I did in my live session last night. Very fun!


***

Saturday, December 3, 2011

A Possible Christmas! —
My latest commission morphed into my first ever Christmas card! Ha!


This is what I do every day!

Merry Fucking Christmas!

***

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Invisible Woman as Howard the Duck —
While working on a new commission featuring Invisible Woman, I had an opportunity to use a pose I remembered from Howard the Duck #14, art by Gene Colan. Getting those wild fingers right was fun!


***
The 2012 Calendar is Here! —
The Ultra Fem 2012 Calendar has been printed, and the first batch are IN MY HANDS! They're beautiful! If you still want to order an autographed calendar, I'll extend the deadline to Dec 9!

http://utrafemstore.tumblr.com/2012calendar


***

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Night Mistress pinup —
I drew this during my live stream tonight.


***

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

'Walking Dead' just saved itself —
(There may be spoilers here, so read at your own risk.)
Last night, I saw the latest episode of Walking Dead, and I have to say, "Wow."

I've read the comics from the beginning, and it's always held my attention. That's rare. So when the TV show came along, I was more than a little skeptical. Can you blame me?

I waited until weeks after the first season was over before watching the whole thing. I have to say I liked it. They bottled the "feel" of the comics. I did NOT like the final episode, though. It didn't resemble anything from the comics, and it was out of place with the rest of the show. It was too "Resident Evil" for me. And the A-Team action scene at the end? Don't get me started.

Again, I waited a while before starting the second season. And again, it was good. Better than good, actually, with some amazing moments. The surgery scene and Carl's seizure were so well-crafted, they made me a little sick. Zombie gore is passé. Easy. Making me care about a character? That's hard.

But then, last week's episode fell flat for me. The clumsy attempt at a pro-life message was typical Hollywood and very disappointing. Almost lost me there. And I was getting tired of the current story arc, which seemed to be going nowhere.

Then came episode 7. Wow. I didn't see it coming. I love it when that happens. I'll keep watching.

***
New Rule —
I've had to add a new rule to my LIST. You just don't post a money dispute against me without contacting me first! Everybody knows that a dispute in any payment service can result in a suspension or loss of the account. Attacking my only way of making money does NOT help any of us. I sure as hell can't refund any money if I lose my account! Everybody knows my list is months long, and I'll always answer your questions. I've refunded money before without argument, so if you feel the need to "take action," you're gone. I mean BANNED. I won't work with you.

***

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Double Penetration series! —
FOR GIRLS ONLY! I've opened a set of 12 commission slots for female characters who crave cock in both holes! For the regular price of a single-character drawing ($60), you'll give your female OC the gift of two large men! CONTACT ME!
  1. Johara 
  2. Elzhei
  3. Foxy Redhead
  4. Seiko
  5. Invincibelle 
  6. Cream
  7.  
  8.  
  9.  
  10.  
  11.  
  12.  
***

    Friday, November 25, 2011

    Drawing #400! —
    Last year's commission record was 300. This year, it will be WAY past 400! I just completed commission #400 for the year 2011! After last year, I didn't see how I could keep up the pace. Not only did I do it, I somehow got FASTER! What will happen next year??

    ***

    Saturday, November 19, 2011

    New Threesome Deal! —
    $60 for one full-color character +$45 each additional character. 10 slots open!
    THIS WEEK ONLY: 3-some for the price of a 2-some! CONTACT ME!
    I don't do this often! Jump on it!

    1. Halo / Mass Effect futa crossover 
    2. Mass Effect futa threesome 
    3. Raven Windtalker and La Diablesse 
    4. Cheetah (DC), Tigra and Cheetara
    5. Ultra Fem universe threesome (artist's choice) 
    6. Mass Effect futa threesome 
    7. Mass Effect futa threesome 
    8. Lady Death / Rayne threesome
    9. Chiana, Aeryn Sun and Zhaan futas
    10.  
    ***

    Wednesday, November 16, 2011

    Saturday, November 12, 2011

    It's Good to be The Pan —
    Here's a little idea that made me laugh.


    Mermaids.

    ***

    Thursday, November 10, 2011

    New Wallpaper! —
    Featuring the January art from the 2012 calendar!


    Buy the calendar HERE!

    ***

    Wednesday, November 9, 2011

    I'll be taking a couple of days off from drawing to let my hand relax. Tendons have been hurting lately. I'll let you all know what happens.

    Meanwhile, please order your 2012 Swimsuit Calendar so I can get it to you before X-Mas!

    ***

    Monday, November 7, 2011

    Betty and Veronica —
    Christmas Special. You know you want this.


    UPDATE: I made another B&V spoof cover HERE.

    ***
    Double Penetration drawings! —
    I did some sketching over the weekend, and I really liked the results! So I'm selling the set! 12 drawings of GIANT HARD COCKS teaming up on TIGHT LITTLE HOLES!


    Buy it! You'll love it! ORDER HERE!

    Or check out MY STORE!

    ***

    Friday, November 4, 2011

    Milking Machine —
    The ladies love it!


    A quick live commission from last night.

    ***

    Monday, October 31, 2011

    Happy Halloween! —


    This live commission from Saturday is a mash-up of influences. Can you spot them?

    ***

    Sunday, October 30, 2011

    More Calendar Art! —
    I'm getting close to done with all 12 drawings! Only TWO left! I'll be making a bulk print order by Nov. 7, so please get your orders in!

    This character is She-Man, obviously! She's the first villain I created for the Ultra Fem universe back in 2005. She has a twin sister named He-Ra. Get it?!!


    Her muscular build and short haircut were inspired by Goddess Heather. Google her! You'll be glad you did!

    ***

    Thursday, October 27, 2011

    More Calendar Previews! —
    Another peek at the art I'm preparing for the 2012 Swimsuit Calendar!



    Buy your copy HERE!

    ***

    Wednesday, October 26, 2011

    Mass Effect Futa Threesome —
    It's Kelly Chambers, Miranda Lawson and Samara. Sort of.


    So visit my ONLINE STORE!
    (There's a "FREE STUFF" section!)

    ***

    Monday, October 24, 2011

    Butt-Fuck Machine —
    A hot piece I drew live tonight. You should watch me some time!


    ***

    Saturday, October 22, 2011

    Demon in Costume —
    What does a succubus wear for Halloween? One of my customers answered that question tonight. Here's my latest live commission. Took about an hour.


    ***

    Wednesday, October 19, 2011

    Night Mistress commission —
    My latest live commission. It's Night Mistress bound and attached to a dildo machine. She loves it!


    It's always nice when customers pay me to draw my own characters!

    ***

    Monday, October 17, 2011

    New Items in the Store! —
    I've added the Sweet Emmy and Diana Knight SPECIAL EDITION sets to my store page!
    And also a pre-order page for the 2012 Swimsuit Calendar!
    Give them a visit!

    ***

    Friday, October 14, 2011

    2012 Calendar on sale Soon! —
    I'll be setting up a special store page for the Ultra Fem 2012 Swimsuit Calendar in the next few days! It will be $35, AND I WILL AUTOGRAPH EVERY ONE!

    Meanwhile, here's a preview of the art for February! It's Night Mistress and her BREASTS! In case you didn't, like, NOTICE.

    You need to buy this!

    ***
    Isn't She Neat! —
    Holy crap! {facepalm} I am SO glad my friends and family never saw this! I'd have never heard the end of it! I mean, enduring Robotech was bad enough on its own!



    So, did any of these little girls notice how frowny tuxedo Rick Hunter went out with Minmei in one commercial and THEN Lisa in the next? Get them started on love-trianlge-geometry early!

    (The Lisa doll is actually really pretty.)

    ***

    Wednesday, October 12, 2011

    Big Girl sketch —
    Latest sketch for the 2012 Swimsuit Calendar!


    ***

    Saturday, October 8, 2011

    Boobs! —
    I've come to realize I'm drawing EVERYBODY in the Ultra Fem universe with WAY HUGE BOOBS! But Ultra is supposed to be special in that department! And Night Mistress is supposed to be the biggest by far. So when it comes time to draw NM, WHAT WILL I DO??

    Decisions, decisions...

    ***

    Friday, October 7, 2011

    Latest swimsuit sketch! —
    Almost HALF of the 2012 calendar pages are already sold! This was the second one to go!


    More to come!

    EDIT: The face I drew here was inspired by the style of Colleen Doran. I hope it shows!

    ***

    Thursday, October 6, 2011

    Lady Power, redesigned —
    Okay, here she is! And this is JUST the way I always imagined her!


    The 2012 calendar project has prodded me into documenting this character. She needed it! This sketch was intended to be the basis for her calendar page, but it turned out so well, it will become her OFFICIAL profile art! It DEMANDS IT!

    As you can see, Lady Power is designed to be a kind of yin-yang to Ultra Fem. She has an air of maturity and dignity that Ultra lacks. LP's no-nonsense professionalism and her "prim-and-properness" did not mix well with Ultra's chaotic and impulsive approach to leadership. She simply couldn't stay on the team.

    LP's costume is inspired by the Rocketeer and the golden age Captain Marvel. She shows no skin and her boots have no heels. Ironically, these are traits that Ultra Fem's costume share, but Ultra's bodysuit is designed for ease of REMOVAL. (LP is NOT an exhibitionist like Ultra!) It's all topped off with Kelly Preston's hairdo from Sky High, which impressed me mightily!

    One other thing: Lady Power has a little sister. You'll meet her some day.

    ***

    Wednesday, October 5, 2011

    Lady Power —
    I drew her once back in 2005 when I started the whole Ultra Fem thing, but just that once and never again. I put her on the 2012 calendar list (see the previous entry), and suddenly everybody's asking: WHO IS SHE??

    Okay, here goes. According to the Ultra Fem mythology I've written, Ultra created the Ultra Fem Five team several years ago, and personally invited four other heroines to join her: Night Mistress, The Scratch, New-American Centurion and Lady Power.

    I've written about Centurion HERE. The "other lady" I mentioned was Lady Power. She's a tall brunette with long flowing hair, and powers that are very similar to Ultra's, except her powers are magical in origin. If Ultra is Superman, Lady Power is Shazam. LP is leadership material. Very experienced, professional and headstrong. This, together with the fact that she is OLDER than Ultra, made things just... NOT work. The two of them have some sort of uneasy history, but I haven't written details yet.

    I do know that, the night Centurion and Lady Power left the group... SOMETHING happened. I'm not going to say just what, but it was important.

    Does that help? ;)

    ***

    Tuesday, October 4, 2011

    Adopt an Ultra! —
    Sponsor a page of art for the Ultra Fem 2012 Swimsuit Calendar!
    Here's a preview of the type of art you'll get! YUM!


    12 drawings are available! Adopt one for $60!
    Your choices are:
    1. Ultra Fem (the art seen above!) - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    2. Night Mistress - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    3. The Scratch - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    4. The Martian Manhater - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    5. Big Girl - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    6. Under Girl - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    7. Cattail - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    8. The Pinnacle - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    9. Lady Power - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    10. New-American Centurion - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    11. She-Man - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    12. Ultra Fem again - SOLD! - COMPLETE!
    You will get:
    • A NUDE version of the art, which will not be published elsewhere
    • High-resolution art 
    • Your name on the calendar, and links here on the site
    • If you're an artist, maybe I can paste something of yours in there! 
    I hope I've explained it clearly. If not, ASK ME!
    (Sorry, but the calendar itself will cost extra. They're just too expensive to give away.)

    ***
      Ultra Fem swimsuit sketch —
      I realized the other day that it's been an awful long time since I drew any of my own characters. And I miss Ultra! So I started this sketch that will become a swimsuit drawing. And it gave me an idea for next year's calendar. Stay tuned!


      We never get to see her smile, do we?
      :D

      ***

      Sunday, October 2, 2011

      Troll Futa in Bondage —
      Another new sketch!


      We haven't seen his hot Warcraft bitch in a while. All the she-males have been few and far between lately.

      ***

      Friday, September 30, 2011

      New Sketch —
      First sketch for a new drawing I started the other day.


      ***
      Dark City — 
      Yesterday, I watched this weird-ass 1998 movie called Dark City. I remember the year it came out Roger Ebert picked it as the best film of the year, and I was so incredulous, I went and rented it. I found it memorable, but certainly NOT the best. I remember Kiefer Sutherland's performance was REALLY bad, and I remember noticing there was a very distracting crazy music soundtrack that never stopped playing. I also have a strong memory of thinking Jennifer Connelly looked awful.

      Watching it today, my impressions were much the same, except Jennifer Connelly looked fine. I don't know what I was thinking back then. Kiefer Sutherland was still terrible. I mean REALLY awful. What the hell was he trying to do?? Just bad, bad acting.

      For those of you who don't know, Dark City belongs in the same category as The Matrix and The 13th Floor. It's a bit more plausible than the other two, though, and I give it that consideration only grudgingly. The idea of the world and everything in it being entirely simulated or a giant hoax is just not a premise I can suspend enough disbelief for. At least in Dark City almost everybody can tell something is very wrong with the world. They're not stupid.

      I see similarities to a bad old anime movie called Megazone 23. Also, there's a scene that's almost identical to one in Urusei Yatsura 2: Beautiful Dreamer. If you've seen both movies, you'll know which scene I'm talking about. (Beautiful Dreamer, by the way, is excellent! I recommend it highly!)

      You should give Dark City a look, but don't go into it expecting a great movie.

      While reading about Dark City, I kept seeing references to City of Lost Children, which was unknown to me. So I downloaded it. After looking at the first scene, I'm hooked. I'll let you know...

      ***

      Thursday, September 29, 2011

      Rei, the Ghost Dog —
      Sexy, busty, naked ghost-dog-girl in outer space. I drew this tonight live. You can see a recording of the session on my LIVE STREAM page.


      ***

      Tuesday, September 27, 2011

      Sweet Emmy Art Set! —
      Here's a surprise I've been working on for months. It's an exclusive set of drawings featuring the characters of Sweet Emmy, and it's ONLY available directly from Emmy herself!


      The set sells for $12.95!
      Contact Emmy at emmycommission [at] gmail.com

      ***

      Monday, September 26, 2011

      Succubus —
      New drawing from last night's live session.


      ***
      Galaxy High and Reboot —
      Complete DVDs! Just had to show these off!


      ***

      Sunday, September 25, 2011

      Thursday, September 22, 2011

      No DC for me —
      I'm confused and more than a little pissed off by all the rave reviews I'm seeing for the new DC titles. I haven't read any mainstream comics at all for years now, and when I occasionally pick one up, I see nothing that makes me want to. I've seen the covers for all the new DC first issues, and they are, without exception, uninspiring. Most of them look like FAN ART, for fuck sake! Downright amateurish! Seriously, did they just trawl DeviantArt for these covers?

      The whole thing looks like a revival of the horrible 90s, which killed my personal comics habit in the first place. They gave Liefeld a book?? Really?? That fact alone will make me stay away forever. Don't tell me to read these books. I won't. Seriously, I won't.

      ***

      Sunday, September 18, 2011

      Super-Witch sketch —
      Here's the sketch and line art for one of my current large commission pieces. It's inspired by the 1980s Avengers artwork of John Byrne.


      This is fun!

      ***

      Saturday, September 17, 2011

      Sapphire Proposes to Scarlet —
      I worked on this commission for a long time.


      ***

      Friday, September 16, 2011

      Monday, September 12, 2011

      Sunday, September 11, 2011

      Draenei sketch — 
      After all that talk last Thursday about getting serious and doing some drawing, all I've done since then is sleep, with the occasional facebooking or tweeting. It's been GOOD sleep, though, and I feel better today. I actually DID some sketching this morning, and I might actually finish this drawing later today.


      ***

      Thursday, September 8, 2011

      Threesome Deal! SOLD OUT! —
      $60 for one full-color character +$45 each additional character.

      THIS WEEK ONLY: 3-some for the price of a 2-some! CONTACT ME!
      1. Sabrina DP scene
      2. Watamaraka and Carrera give Vipra double blowjob 
      3. Demona, Sheva Alomar and Dr. Blight
      4. Kim Possible and her 2 brothers
      5. Lt. Uhura with 2 lesbian Klingons
      6. Dr. Who futa companions 
      7. Uhura with her Orion roommate and 7of9 
      8. Futa Amidala blows futa Leia and slave Leia 
      9. Sister of Battle with a futa Desire Demon and futa Sister Repentia 
      10. RESERVED 
      With all the health problems recently, I need to catch up on sales. So take advantage of this deal! You know I don't do this often anymore!

      ***
      Health News —
      I lost pretty much all of the past 7 days because of allergies. No really, they slammed me. Bedridden most of the time. Breathing problems got so bad, I went to a doctor Tuesday morning and started a couple of prescription meds. They immediately made me so sick, I couldn't stand it. By late Wednesday, before even two full days of the stuff, I stopped them. Don't ever take Methylprednisolone (Prednisone)! Seriously! I can't believe how bad the side-effects were. My lungs opened up, sure, but I had to pay for it with extreme weakness, sore muscles (especially legs), BAD stomach pain, and for some reason, it attacked my hip joints. I couldn't walk! It turned me into a geriatric! WTF??

      So that shit's gone! I've always avoided medications. They either don't do anything at all or they try to kill me. But there are millions of people out there taking this shit every day. Are they having the same side-effects but just keep taking the pills?? They MUST be! No wonder we're so fucked up!

      I stopped the pills last night and felt better almost immediately. And had a decent meal, which I couldn't while I was hurting so bad. I feel almost normal this morning, and I'm breathing okay. So I'll draw today, but I missed a whole week of live art, so I'm behind on money. (See the next post for a new threesome deal.)

      Saturday, September 3, 2011

      The Phantom Futa —
      As imagined by ME! Style inspired, of course, by The King Himself! This is the family-safe version. If you can’t stand she-males, you better NOT go see the original at FutanariObsession.com.


      This was months in the making. I threw out a lot of false starts and bad sketches until I realized I was trying to do things that didn't fit my style. Then I thought of THIS. It was perfect for me! I wanted to do something that would be completely unique for this character. I think I succeeded.

      ***

      Thursday, September 1, 2011

      Monday, August 29, 2011

      Tentacle DP —


      Drew this in a live session the other day. Everybody loves this stuff.

      ***
      NEWS MIX —
      I call it a "mix" cause their's some good, some less-than-good. I've gotten a lot of art done these last two weeks despite being half-bedridden, wheezing and coughing. I was pretty much normal yesterday, but I'm wheezing again today. Head hurts a little. Still sleeping almost round the clock. Over the weekend, I finished work on a giant commission I've been secretly picking at since last year. It'll be a few weeks before I can show it, but it's coming. Had to buy all new clothes last week cause I've gotten so fat. Never a happy thing. Sales are okay, so I'm getting by, but the last two Complete Lisa sets are my poorest sellers. I'll go back to the smaller sets next time. There's no new 50 Futa set on the horizon cause I'm just not getting orders for she-males like I used to. Funny how trends come and go. Hopefully I'll be less dependent on art for income this fall, which will probably be a good thing. We'll see.

      ***

      Monday, August 22, 2011

      Complete Lisa 2011, Part 3! —
      Officially RELEASED today! Order it HERE!


      ***
      Ms. Bellum and Miss Buxley —
      Here's a look at what I drew last night. What fun! This was my first Ms. Bellum (Miss Bellum? Miz Bellum?) commission! I think, anyway. I've done SO MANY drawings, LOL! And definitely my first Beetle Bailey commission! Miss Buxley is surprisingly hot! I certainly hope I'm the first to put Mort Walker's art style on a Gil Elvgren pose. I have to be, right?



      ***

      Saturday, August 20, 2011

      Huge Boobs in Bondage —
      Now this is the stuff I'm supposed to be posting, right?!


      I drew this during my live session last night. Took about an hour. If you come to my live streams, you'll see stuff like this every time. (So where are you??)

      ***

      Thursday, August 18, 2011

      Support Slimy Thief! Get Stuff! —
      Regular visitors here know Slimy Thief! Sidney Lima is a semi-regular visitor to my live streams, and he drew this awesome ULTRA FEM art last year! Toss a little dough his way and make Slimy Thief keep happening!



      ***
      Shorty Awards? —
      Somebody nominated me in the Shorty Awards! Who?? How??
      Anyway, VOTE!
      http://shortyawards.com/Ultrafem

      ***

      Monday, August 15, 2011

      Watamaraka the Demon Domme —
      A live commission I did last night!


      Brunhilde —
      Last week, I discovered an old archived radio show from NPR called The Ring and I, which "explores the impact and influence of Wagner's Ring Cycle." (I strongly recommend you give it a listen!) I learned a heck of a lot of stuff. Stuff I SHOULD have known already. I grew up in a household filled with classical music. Rossini, Verdi, Beethoven, and even Gilbert and Sullivan were everywhere. All that great music from the Bugs Bunny cartoons? I could NAME that stuff! The Marriage of Figaro, The William Tell Overture, The Hungarian Rhapsody, and yes, of course, The Ride of the Valkyrie. I knew all of it.

      We certainly knew who Wagner was. There were Wagner records on the shelves, but I guess my folks weren't much into him. I never learned the stories of these huge operas. When I got older and got into comics, I became a fan of Thor, and later when she showed up, Valkyrie. I always liked the idea that they came from ancient mythology, and again, I knew about the Wagner operas, but I never bothered. Even when the Ring Cycle was sort-of-incorporated into the comics back in Thor #300 (One of my favorites!), I didn't look it up. Somehow, I never read about the operas in college, or even on Google, until now. It's kind of embarrassing.

      But today... after hearing the NPR show and doing some much-needed reading, Brunhilde the Valkyrie is all new for me. And here she is.


      Here's my super-short summary of the four operas:

      • Odin gives Brunhilde, his favorite daughter and leader of the Valkyries, a series of contradictory orders. When she can't follow them, he strips her of her godhood and abandons her on Earth. She ultimately gets even by DESTROYING THE WHOLE DAMN UNIVERSE.


      There. See?

      She doesn't do it with her mighty spear or while riding her mighty winged horse. She does it almost as an afterthought. Brunhilde is not supposed to be the hero of the story. It's supposed to be the mortal idiot man-child Siegfried. When he is killed, Brunhilde's takes the ring from his finger and destroys it, ending everything.

      People who saw the operas for the first time (The whole thing is 18 hours long!) wouldn't have expected this ending. It's all about the ring. It was forged by Alberich the dwarf from magical gold which he stole from the guardian mermaids at the head of the Rhine river. It gives its owner the power to rule the universe. Odin, meanwhile, has contracted Fafnir the giant, the world's greatest magical architect, to build Valhalla, a new realm for the gods to move into. Its awfully expensive, and Odin has no way of paying for it. Fafnir agrees to take the ring as payment, so Odin steals it from Alberich, who curses it as it's being carted away. All who know of the ring will desire it, all who possess it will be murdered by its next owner, and when it's destroyed, all works gained by it will be lost.

      So now Fafnir has the ring. He kills his brother in a quarrel over it, and slinks away into a cave filled with gold where he sits in paranoid seclusion, in the form of your typical gold-hoarding dragon. Odin wants the power of the ring, but he can't own it himself for fear of being killed. So he sets in motion a series of events that he hopes will result in somebody he controls coming into possession of the ring. This includes having lots of babies with innocent mortal women. (Doesn't it always?)

      Enter Brunhilde. Odin has been gathering an infinite army of slain warriors to defend Valhalla against the power of the ring, and that's her job. But then, word arrives that two of Odin's mortal children, Siegmund and Sieglinde, long-lost twins, are having an affair. Not good. Odin sends Brunhilde to bring Siegmund to Valhalla, which means killing him. But she can't do it. Siegmund is ultimately killed in a fixed fight arranged by Odin, who then punishes Brunhilde by turning her mortal and putting her to sleep. He places her in a ring of impenetrable fire.

      Sieglinde dies giving birth to Siegmund's son Siegfried. The boy is raised in seclusion by Mime the dwarf, Alberich's brother, in hopes that he will be able to kill Fafnir and obtain the ring for him. The 18-year-old Siegfried DOES kill Fafnir, but he also kills Mime. He takes the ring and jaunts off to find more adventure, being severely naive, uneducated and fearless. And having never met another person ever. Of course, he turns out to be the one guy who can walk through fire and awaken Brunhilde. He falls for her on sight.

      When Siegfried sleeps with another woman, Brunhilde tells Gunther, the son of Alberich, that Siegfried has one weak spot in his back. So Siegfried dies. Literally stabbed in the back. Then Brunhilde learns that Siegfried's so-called betrayal was arranged by Gunther with a magic potion. So she takes the ring from Siegried's dead hand, orders the Rhinemaidens to come get it, then throws herself into the funeral pyre. Valhalla, paid for by the ring, burns.

      I had to read through this stuff a few times to get all the relationships right, and I left out tons of details and other characters. Actually though, now that I think about it, the whole thing can be summarized in four words:

      • Odin is a dick.


      Yeah, that's it.

      One of the things I find so exciting about all this is that Wagner didn't create any new characters or stories. He took existing mythology and folktales and crunched them all into a convoluted mish-mash that makes a weird kind of sense. (As Nina Paley says, "All creative work is derivative.") He ret-conned it. Just like they do in comics. And along the way, he created a new way of telling it.

      I have my own views on Brunhilde. Some day, I'll write down my own version of the ring. If Wagner could make shit up, so can I.

      Oh, and you all know how much I admire Steve Gerber's work. Looking back on his stint with the Defenders now, his handling of Valkyrie as a lost goddess with no memory of her past or her husband makes a perverse kind of reverse-sense. I get it now, Steve. I get it.

      ***